backstage @ Youth Muscle Competition (khai) 

sunday @ east coast (Youth Muscle Competition) 

clowning around with de camera (womad2005) 

womad2005 (khai, shaleen n herman) 

sheema workshop @ womad2005 (khai)
Arrived @ Womad (Singapore's very own Woodstock-ish festival) held at Fort Canning Park, at about 8pm. The festival was already in full swing by the time we arrived. Had our dinner, which consisted of junk food like burgers and other greasy stuff, which we rarely indulged in nowadays. We caught up with Herman and Shaleen. Walked around the stores and checked some of the acts. We finally decided to chill in the workshop room and embraced the air-conditioing. Sweetie and I stayed on for The Dhol Foundation's kick-ass "Sounding The Drums" workshop. However, the club set, where we met Kalid and Dora, was much of a letdown, with the DJs playing hip-hop remix.. Generally, this is my 5th Womad and I must say it wasn't as great as the ones before but it's my first Womad with Sweetie and that sure makes the event a memorable one..

Failing to look from within

Many people kept saying that they think they are losing themselves or maybe the quintessence of their being. We hear this all the time. “I don’t know who I am anymore” “What have I become?” “I think I am losing myself”… I guess to lose the self is to suddenly realize that we are something other than what we thought we were. People start to question about their self usually or most often than not, when they are upset, unhappy or depressed. We must agree that pleasant experiences make life delightful but few know that painful experiences lead to growth. Suffering points up an area where we have not yet grown, where you need to grow and be transformed and change. There is a lesson to be learned but do we recognise that? Many people suffer from a state of delusion, where they see things not as they are but as what they want them to be. It is sad but true. Many do not realise that when one clings on their perception of things, life is destroyed. When one holds on to anything, one ceases to live.

External events do not have the power to hurt us. People do not have the power to hurt us. They really don't. It's ourselves that give this supremacy to them to hurt us. So why then do we even allow it in the first place? Did we do it unconsciously or subconsciously? In order to get awareness, we have got to see, which brings us to the importance of clarity of perception. One cannot see if one is prejudiced. Almost everything and every person we look at, we look at in a prejudiced way. We need to open up our perceptions. Without the clarity of perceptions, we will definitely fail to respond accurately, which will lead to misunderstandings and situations where people will get hurt.

People say love is blind. Are they? I know that addiction and attachments are blind. Clinging, craving, and desire are blind. But not true love. The root of sorrow is craving. Craving distorts and destroys perception. Fears and desires haunt us. We were brought up to need people, for acceptance, approval and appreciation. With these, we will then deem ourselves as happy and successful. However, they are conventions, things that are invented, but we don't realise that they don't correspond to reality. When we were young, we were conditioned for unhappiness. We are inured to believe that in order to be happy you need money, a flashy car, a big house, success, a good career, you name it. Unless we get these things, we are not going to be happy. Now, that is what is called an attachment. An attachment is a belief that without something you are not going to be happy. Sadly, many people are enslaved by their attachments, very much tangible. Listen to the conversations around you when you can, you hear people talking about their attachments with such pride that they make me sick. Listen to yourselves, people.. Does that pair of limited edition Nike trainers or that Summer collection Gucci bag or that maharishi top or that new set of Bose speakers really define who you really are? To me, they are just aesthetically pleasing conventions and attachments that bound…

my exploration with FreehandMX: almostopia series 3 

my exploration with FreehandMX: almostopia series 4

old pic @ NIE's drawing studio (2004) 

post-gig pic @ NUS 

d.o.c's yummy guitarist, khai  

d.o.c's keyboardist, Ess 

The death of Cinema's 5th gig @ NUS

The Death of Cinema @ NUS (11-08-05)

Their set was scheduled at a strategic time of 2034hrs. Playing at the same gig is Force Vomit. Arriving at the venue at 1830hrs, the crowd was weak. The turnout was pretty bad for an outdoor concert at NUS. One of the many viable reasons I can think of would have to be the IHG (Inter-hall games) that were going on at the same time at the different halls there. The crowd consisted mainly of girlfriends and friends of the bands that were playing at the gig. The Death of Cinema came on, as scheduled. They played a total of 4 songs. The audience did not respond too well to their music, just like the previous set by Great Spy Experiment which I attended here, at NUS. The crowd at NUS generally look out for commercial or radio-friendly music, which is the norm for many. I must say it is not one of the good gigs that they had played. Denise Keller was the MC at the event and commented after their set: "Everyone, please give a round of applause to The Death of Cinema. A unique band.." The implication of that statement.. Hmm.. I leave it as it is...

The Death of Cinema @ NUS 

tough cookies vs pixies

A topic I generally ignore but after seeing some things that happened to me and my girlfriends. I just like to pose this question to guys out there who actually take the time to read my blog entries. Sweetie said a few days back, "Tough cookies get tough love".. It puzzled me.. Are pixies generally stereotyped to be more fragile, docile and delicate that they are always offered the better deal of assurances, surprises and love even?? How about tough cookies, like myself? Is it that tough cookies are generally street-wise.. that's why guys have the perception that we are able to handle rejection, pain and hurt better than our lace and flowery "demure" counterparts, aka pixies.. Tough cookies get no flowers.. no kind words.. But we are all women after all, regardless of our labels, "pixies" or "tough cookies" or not..... Please leave me your two cents worth on this topic in my comment box.. Love to hear from anyone who have anything to enlighten me on this topic..